Parihar Makkala Sahayavani – help for teens with crushes

Parihar Makkala Sahayavani – help for teens with crushes

PARIHAR Makkala Sahayavani

PARIHAR Makkala Sahayavani is a Charitable Institution Registered under the Societies Act 1960. This is under the initiative of Bengaluru City Police.  The Institution is situated at the office of the Commissioner of Police and is meticulously working on issues related to women, children and families for the past 25 years.

According to Parihar Makkala Sahayavani, 30% of the cases are of teenage infatuation which is leading to youngsters running away from home.  This problem is on the rise recently.

The onset of puberty is the precursor to a series of bio-psycho-social-intellectual changes. A crush is that first flush of a strange new feeling, undefined and inexplicable. It is nature’s way of telling us that all is well with the natural processes of growing up. The new uncertain feelings are an important milestone of puberty and bringing in their wake a series of emotional changes.

Primary among them is the gradual awareness of an interest in the opposite sex and that cannot be a bad thing. Since we want our children to enter into long-lasting relationships as adults in the future. Some teens tend to discuss their crush freely among peers and this leads to teasing and pairing up of individuals. They may begin to believe that they are ‘in love’ when they are actually experiencing a harmless crush.

Tips for parents

The cautious parent switches to an advisory mode, offering all kinds of messages like — “This is not the age for all this”, “concentrate on your studies”, “and do not waste time on unwanted things”. “But, I cannot help feeling this way,” is what the child thinks. Yes, because these changes are being determined by their natural hormonal cycle, over which they have no control.

According to Preethi S Baliga, a counselor at Parihar Makkala Sahayavani, teenage infatuation could lead to serious consequences. It is especially for the boy, who could face a jail term of up to 7 years depending on the gravity of the case.

At Parihar Makkala Sahayavani they counsel the child and the family.  The follow up  is done with at least 4 sessions of counseling to make sure the child returns to his/her routine.

The need of the hour is to make sure the children don’t slip into depression and are counseled onto the right track.

A teenager is driven towards crush when there is over expectation from parents.  Another contributor is substance abuse like sniffing of whitener, glue, cigarette, and consumption of ganja. The major influence being glamourization of sex and love affairs by social media.

Consideration

  • Encourage teens to understand the changes.
  • Help them develop a healthy attitude towards themselves and their peers. Nurture their self-worth.
  • Their physical, mental, emotional and emerging sexual energies must be channelized into productive channels of healthy and creative activities.
  • Teach them the value and security of moving in mixed groups, rather than isolating themselves with one particular boy or girl.
  • Allow them to spend this phase of their life getting to know as many boys and girls. Let them learn what their own levels of comfort are with different types of people. Prepare them for their world.
  • Stand back and give them all the support they need.
  • Keep it light, do not overreact and get melodramatic

 

 

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